Fun, Food, and Fears

21 weeks have flown by! I can't believe we are already on the other side of the halfway point. The next few months are going to be gone in a blink at this rate. And that's ok because I can't wait to meet this sweet boy!

We've definitely been keeping busy. After the gender reveal party it took me a while to get our house back in order and feel like I was rested again. The anniversary of my older brother passing away was a few days later and that always drains me. Eric was so sweet this year and sent me an edible arrangement and some balloons. Charlee made the balloons hers as soon as she saw them and I thoroughly enjoyed the chocolate covered strawberries. My husband knows me so well! 

Charlee and I have stayed busy. We've been strawberry picking a few times and she's been a great helper making strawberry jam and strawberry shortcake. We have been going to the big park near our house on sunny days and she has been making all kinds of friends. I also registered her for school in the fall. She's on the wait list because the school keeps its class sizes so small, but the director seems confident she will get in. Of course classes start right around the time our jelly bean will be debuting, so that will make things more complicated because I can't drive for 6-8 weeks after surgery. But we will figure it out. I can't believe she's going to be going to school! Sure, it's only 2 days a week from 9am-1pm, but I feel like she should still be a little baby cradled in my arms! 

This past weekend one of my college roommates was in town and we met her and her husband for lunch at Fleet's Landing. Afterwards we went to an event at Eric's work that had the Budwiser Clydesdales. Of course Charlee was interested in them for about 5 seconds before she only cared about playing in the bounce house.

I've been busy planning for baby boy too. I've planned his baby shower that will be in July. I'm really excited for it. It's going to be very small and intimate at a local restaurant. He is my second, so it doesn't need to be huge, but I think it's important to celebrate each child because they are all equally loved and equal blessings. I'm super excited because my mom couldn't come to Charlee's shower. My grandfather passed away a few days before and she had to go to Canada. I couldn't reschedule because people were coming from out of state. So it will be nice for her to finally attend a shower for one of her grandchildren. I also think I know how I want the nursery to look. I've even purchased a couple of decorative pieces for it already! My next step is to finally sort Charlee's baby items so we can consign some and get the things we need for our new arrival. 

I've also been having some interesting cravings this time around. My most interesting craving with Charlee was corn on the cob. That hasn't happened this time (yet). But I have been craving ramen noodles. I don't even like ramen. I refuse to indulge in that craving because I feel like I would regret it immediately. I've also been craving toasted tomato sandwiches. Toast, miracle whip, tomato, and black pepper. I could eat them all day long if I let myself! I've also been craving Cheetos. That's another one I don't let myself indulge in too often. I'm still going for a scoop of chocolate ice cream for dessert every day though. Which was a staple in my first pregnancy too. Now if I could just get Eric to take me out for Indian food more often because curry is something else I could eat for every meal! 

I don't remember if I had any really crazy dreams with Charlee. But this time around I have them all of the time! Dreams about the baby being a monster or being multiples, dreams about being chased or attacked, dreams about going into labor, and those are just the ones I remember. I'm sure a lot of my dreaming is from stress and worry. I worry about baby being healthy, how Charlee will adjust, how we will get her to and from school, if I will sleep, if he will sleep as well as his sister did, and so much more! I worry about the kind of world my kids will grow up in. There is so much unrest in society right now. I just want my kids to grow up in a world of love and acceptance.

Right now the jelly bean is about 12.7oz and the size of a banana. His digestive systems is developing and he is beginning to swallow some amniotic fluid as practice. He's an active little guy and I can already see his movements as well as feel them. He's mostly active around 8:30am, 8:30pm, and midnight. 

Gender Reveal Results and Halfway There!!!

Today I am officially 20 weeks. I can't believe how quickly this pregnancy is flying by!

Some days it feels like I've been pregnant forever. Especially when I look at my old workout clothes. But overall I feel like the past few months have been a blur. Charlee is great at keeping me busy and distracted! The truth is, since I have to get a repeat cesarean, we are actually more than halfway to meeting our baby. I will more than likely be scheduled for delivery around the 39 week mark since that is when I delivered Charlee. But time will tell. 

This past Saturday was the gender reveal party. We had so much fun and are so grateful to have so many wonderful friends and family members come out to support us. We had an ultrasound the Saturday before just to find out the gender. The tech said she was very confident in her findings. We even got a little waive! On Thursday I had to go to our OB's office for a medical ultrasound to make sure baby is developing properly. I was pretty nervous because Eric couldn't come to the appointment with me. I was so scared of getting bad news. 

Luckily everything went perfectly. We had the tests done for genetic disorders the month prior but requested not to be told the results. I didn't want the extra worry and stress like we had with Charlee and it wouldn't have changed anything in the long run. But the doctor told me the results anyway since they all came back perfectly fine! I was beyond relieved. The ultrasound tech said that baby is measuring between 17-22 weeks on all measurements and weighed about 11oz. I asked if I should be concerned about how large the jelly bean is and she said not to worry because Charlee measured similarly and baby is apparently very long with a big head. Apparently Eric and I make giant babies with big heads. 

By Saturday morning I was itching to find out the results of the gender exams. Malory did a great job of avoiding me to keep the secret a secret all week too. The weather wasn't very cooperative and we ended up setting up the party inside with a couple tables and the grill under a tent outside. It wasn't how I envisioned the set up, but it still looked nice. Once the weather cleared up we inflated a couple bounce houses for the kids and everyone gathered outside. And here is the result:

IT'S A BOY!!!

We are beyond thrilled to be giving Charlee a baby brother. She kept saying she thinks it's a boy and she wants a brother so she can play trucks with him, so she was right! I will miss frilly dresses and big bows, but it will be fun to make him look like a mini Eric in tiny boat shoes. I already have the nautical themed nursery planned in my head (I may have been holding onto the idea since I was pregnant with Charlee...). 

Here are some pictures from the party:

I'm still in shock a little about how things worked out. There are 3 Widener boys in the family. Eric's cousin had a daughter then a son. Eric's brother had a daughter then a son. And now Eric has a daughter and is expecting a son. What are the odds? Maybe we should buy a lottery ticket...

We do have a name picked out and we will reveal the full name at another time. But we will be calling him 'Beck', which is a family name on Eric's side. 

I guess it's time to get to work sorting, selling, and consigning Charlee's things so I can start shopping for her baby brother! 

Sick and Tired. Literally.

It's been an uninteresting couple of weeks. Which is probably a good thing because it felt like we always had something going on since November. 

The Friday after my fall I went to the doctor to get checked out. Everything was fine and I was advised to add more iron to my diet as a precaution. The jelly beans heart rate was strong at 150bpm. The weekend was pretty low key. Malory and Mackenzie came over for a play date and sleepover so Malory and I could watch the series finale of Glee. As always, we had a great time. 

I spent most of last week working on crafts for the gender reveal. And last Sunday I took Charlee to a new church that seems like it may be a good fit for our family. We are planning to go on Easter to get a better feel for the service. Charlee loves church and really enjoyed all of the music. 

This week has been pretty uneventful. I have spent most of it in bed while Eric had to work from home because I was too sick to watch Charlee. Being sick while pregnant is awful because I can't take most meds. I can take Tylenol and sudafed, both of which haven't helped on the slightest so I only took one dosage each. I can also use a saline nasal spray which has helped a little. Thank goodness I'm sick now and not next week. There is no way I would have been ready for the party if this happened next week!

So here I am, 18 weeks pregnant. Tomorrow we have a gender reveal ultrasound but the gender will be placed into a sealed envelope. We won't know the gender until the party. That is going to be the longest week ever!